Dubai and Paying it it Forward…

It is a known fact that having cancer doesn’t just affect a patient but the entire family. The last few months have taken their toll on myself and Gurveer. So last week a group of Gurv’s friends, who have been his support network for the last 2 years were visiting Dubai to celebrate a significant birthday and Gurveer had been invited along.

The debates about whether to go or not had been going on for the last 3 weeks until last weekend when I quickly managed to end the debate. I simply turned to Gurv and said, look if it was the other way around and I had the chance to go, you know I would be straight on that plane. Then the packing commenced!! It doesn’t look like we will be getting a break together soon so there is no point both of us missing out so off he went!!

I really did want Gurv to get his break and get away for a week however I didn’t know if I would cope and was actually quite worried about early starts all week. Saying that I just kept repeating to myself, that YOU CAN COPE! What is the worst that will happen and I’ve got so much support around me.

All I had to do for that week was visit the hospital twice for my bloods on Monday and infusion on Wednesday, get the kids to school and back each day and of course feed them!!

Firstly, whenever Gurv goes away there is always drama. Last time he tried to have a jolly, I had a 20 foot tree fall into my garden crashing through two fences. So of course this time a panel of my conservatory roof had to just fall down from the place where it has been sitting securely over the last 10 years. Of course it did why would it not just shatter into a zillion, billion, tiny pieces as soon as Gurv went away, on the same day of my infusion while I was in hospital! 🙄🙄🙄

I checked and realised that it was only the inner panel of the double glazing luckily, so there was no rain coming through! I was feeling quite unwell after my treatment so I looked, I gasped and then I shut the conservatory door and thought I will deal with this tomorrow!

I was on a mission all week to combat my fatigue and just cope for the whole week so strictly at 8:30 p.m. I made sure I was in my bed ready to knock out by 9 p.m, so that I could wake up up in the morning drop the kids off and get back for an extra sleep before starting my day.

This week’s the kids are also practicing for a karate grading so I had the kids from next door come around and practice karate in the evenings. To my neighbours, this may have been just practicing karate. For me, this was my motivation to keep my evening in a good routine and my neighbour Harpreet coming over for company during that time which was a good distraction and passed my time nicely.

I had Leena bring food on Tuesday and my friend Manveer take me for lunch on Friday and took me to the shops to buy dinner for the evening.

On Wed, Thurs and Friday, Suraj needed to be picked after school as he had a music exam and singing etc. Now remember the Luton saga!!!! There was no way I was doing that again and I I’m really struggling to sit in the car for long journeys. My sister Anita said I will go go and like a hero went off to pick Suraj up on Wednesday and took him to his music exam and then stayed the night with me me since I had just had my treatment and was looking a little bit worse for wear.

On Thursday there was more singing so my brother-in-law, Mameet volunteered to go and fetch Suraj from school. On Friday I braved the journey with my neighbour Harpreet driving to collect my little singy songy boy from his class!!

This week, I managed!!! This week friends and family rallied around to help me out while Gurveer was away so he could get a much needed break!! This week, the kids have done some extra chores. This week, friends dropped food for us to make my time easier. This week friends and family took out time to pick up Suraj from his school so he didn’t have to miss his clubs. This week, Suraj didn’t miss out on his singing practice.

QE Boys School has organised a memorial service to commemorate the life of Eamonn Harris, who was Headmaster of the School from 1984 to 1999, who passed away in the Autumn.

A simple gesture of collecting a dedicated Suraj from his after school clubs will lead to comfort for friends and family of Eamonn Harris at a memorial service.

When you pay it forward, directly and indirectly, you never know how many people are affected by your kindness. I am often at the receiving end of everyone’s kindness so I know that lovely feeling all too well. Do one nice thing today, be it a call to a friend or tea with a neighbour. Look directly around you first and don’t think too hard….. just do x