I can categorically say that this is the most tired I have ever felt in my life! Tired doesn’t even come close to describing it but I’m just too tired to think of a better description!
Even after having kids, the night feeds, the early starts, looking after a new born…. that was a breeze compared to this nonsense!
I know at this point some of you may be yelling out…… HAVE THE STEROIDS….but well here’s the thing.
- Mentally, I’m struggling with taking more drugs. I am supposed to be taking Aspirin but had to drop back as something is causing me a bit of belly ache right now so not wanting to add anything else to the mix.
- I will have to deal with the side effects of the drugs…become fatty Sal again
- I WILL forget to taper off them and give myself the shakes again
- The main point …. if I am knackered, it is because I need to rest. My body needs to heal. Instead of masking this with the steroids and becoming active surely, I just need to rest it out rather than tricking my body into being not tired and pushing on ahead!
Its like those tight knicker things that squeeze you in under a dress….. the flabs have to come out somewhere!!!
I feel that I am making slow but steady progress. Quite slow but strong. I’d rather get right down to the root of the issue and deal with it than finding a temporary fix and springing a big leak further down the line.
I actually need to go and have my oxygen therapy like right now but that big ole journey into London is just not happening at the moment. If I am still like this by the weekend, I will go and have my bloods checked.
When thinking of a title for this blog, I realised it has only been 2 weeks since I did my last chemo. It seemed like it was longer, I really should go easier on myself. Oh man, Did I make the right decision of not having the last chemo session!! I’d truly be on the floor right now.
I am pretty much confined to my house and really not doing much in it!! I have been sleeping and resting. I have a few hrs active time per day…. around 3 to 5 hours in the morning. Late afternoon, I get a nap in and then I will get another couple of hours out of my evening! Luckily my dear friend Leena has kept us fed with good home cooked indian food for 3 days this week. Leena rocks!!!
My back is a teeny bit better…. on Monday, I had acupuncture and managed a good yoga class. I am using a high strength CBD balm daily for pain…. better than more pills!!
I stole from a friend. People keep asking me how I am!! This is my response!!!
So with all that said, next week I will be taking myself off to a Wellness retreat in Bristol for 3 days. I could probably do with a little contemplation and self help. Address any issues that I have managed to push aside and ignore while I got on with my treatment. I am looking forward to this and will report back.
Appointments have started to roll in now for July. Everything needs to be very timely. I actually woke up this morning and thought, have we reached mid June yet…….yes wishing the time away!
On another note….. as I hobbled out to the garden this evening, I saw my strawberry patch florishing!!! I have not done much this year so quite pleased with everything that has just picked itself up from last year!! I do have some well established plants that bloomed this year. Dying to get out and do some proper gardening but hey ho…. I’m going to stay tucked in my duvet working my merry way through NETFLIX at the moment!!!
Picked all the juicy ones, I am not risking leaving these out to ripen! These organic beauties are all mine !!!